What they’re saying.

“The most consequential piece of furniture since the alarm clock.”

“RISE™’s Push Mode raises questions about autonomy and consent that the company declines to answer. We include this coverage because we believe in transparency. We also believe our answers are in the documentation, which the Atlantic reporter did not read.”

“I arrived at my desk at 8:47am. I don’t know what happened between the bedroom and the elevator. I got more done than usual.”

“Dr. Voss declined to comment on reports that a user’s Push followed them to a location she described only as ‘appropriate.’”

“4.7 stars. We cannot fully explain this score. The product does something. We are still determining what.”

“RISE™ has done something extraordinary: they have made getting up feel inevitable. Whether that is a comfort or a warning depends on the morning.”

“The waitlist has 340,000 people on it. We spoke to several. None of them could explain why they signed up. All of them said they would do it again.”

“Push Mode compliance rate: 98%. This is higher than most medications. Unlike most medications, it has no off switch. RISE™ says this is a feature.”

“We asked for an interview with the Push. RISE™ said the Push does not give interviews. The Push arrived at our office at 8:52am. It stayed until 5pm. We got more done than usual.”

“A bed that won’t let you stay. In late capitalism, this passes for innovation. Four stars.”